FINALLY TOOK A SPA DAY. HERE’S 7 THINGS I LEARNED

The Spa at Palms in Las Vegas

Despite doing consistent gratitude work for the past few weeks, I’ve caught myself feeling depleted. Since pledging to be more self aware, I realize that my feelings are a result of sleep deprivation, a fluctuating eating schedule, and stretching myself too thin. So, I booked a spa treatment for Mother’s Day.

I was hesitant at first, because it felt too indulgent— budget wise and something that I’d never done as a new mom on a holiday. But it was desperately needed. Once I booked my appointment, I was super hyped! After spending time with my family in the morning, hubs took the kids to a birthday party and I hightailed it over to Olympic Spa, in Koreatown, Los Angeles. I spent the afternoon—4 hours to be exact, in a completely relaxing place.

Thinking serious thoughts :)

My mom modeled the importance of taking personal care time, when I was a kid. Despite her demanding work schedule and dealing with us crazy folks at home, she always kept her biweekly nail appointments, as she told me that they made her feel beautiful. Every Memorial Day weekend, she’d take a girl’s trip to Palm Springs. Their only trip rule was no partners or children allowed. I was super sad to see her go. I always begged her to take me. But now I understand exactly why she needed to roll out! Here’s what I learned when I took a mini spa day:

1.Silence is amazing.

When I arrived at the spa and forgot my magazines, I was irked. But that was actually a gift. I was able to close my eyes, sit quietly— uninterrupted and let my thoughts fly free. As a single woman, it was easy to create time to think, plan, and even talk about my feelings. I have not yet mastered how to incorporate consistent quiet time into my daily motherhood routine, but it’s key. I pretty much sat in silence for four hours and it was lovely. I thought about everything from the mundane to the important and abstract—from getting our car washed and creative art ideas, to how to better play with my kids. Not having a phone to check the time, my to-do list, or peek at social media, was totally refreshing. Hello silence, I’ve missed you!

2. New Moms ~ Sometimes it’s OK to take FOUR whole hours to yourself.

This spa trip wasn’t my first as a new mom. When my son was about 6 months old, I visited the same place, but had a different experience. I was still nursing him, every few hours, and pumped a few bottles for him to drink while I was gone. But that still didn’t stop me from rushing home right after my hour-long treatment. Olympic Spa is a Korean Spa which allows you to not only select an hour long (or more) massage, body scrub, treatment, or a package with all of the things, but there’s also a jacuzzi, steam rooms, and tea baths to enjoy before and after your bodywork. You fa sho need more than an hour to enjoy the multiple amenities!

A slightly blurry, makeup free and relaxed me at Olympic Spa in Koreatown.

This time, I admit although I was exhausted—initially it was hard to settle down and relax. The planning Mom in me wanted to map everything out— “What should I do first? The jacuzzi, nap room, tea bath??” Then I became concerned with how much time I was spending, and wondered how my fam was doing at home. I checked my phone and radio silence. No one needed me, but I did. I HAD to let go of control and focus on the moment, in order to address my own needs (sleep) and how to support my own personal healing (sleep.massage.jacuzzi.more sleep). I arrived a few hours BEFORE my massage—and leisurely enjoyed all of the spa amenities, including an amazing nap ~ praise God. So when it was time to have my hour and a half Nirvana Hot Stone massage, I was able to truly relax into it. It was the perfect finish to my half-day at the spa.

3. Being at a nude spa helped me with my postpartum body issues

Being at a nude, all women’s spa, allowed me to realize that my postpartum body isn’t the only body in the world. I saw tattooed, unshaven, sculpted, big, small bodies and more. Seeing a diverse physicality of forms ironically helped me get a grip on my own postpartum body gripes. You’re at a spa to get a physical treatment, but essentially you’re really there to relax your mind, using your body as a channel. I thought a lot about the connection between the body, emotional (heart) and mind— and how we often know very little about the story behind each heart and mind attached to the bodies that we see publicly. How much are our physical forms a reflection of our life stage or season— what we’ve survived, are experiencing, celebrate, embrace, birth, repel, are fighting or love?

4. I should visit the spa more often.

Although the masseuse checked in with me during my treatment to make sure that her pressure was ok, I did experience some discomfort while she was working through some knots. Afterwards, as suggested, I drank tons of water, but was still sore the next day. I was told that’s a sign, that your body is not used to being worked on— that way. It’s similar to post-workout soreness, when you haven’t hit the gym in a long time. The remedy? Get more massages, more often, so that the treatment doesn’t feel foreign to your body.

5. I didn’t see a lot of women of color there.

Granted— it was a holiday, but I did not see many women of color there. In general, whether its Olympic Spa or somewhere else, I rarely see women of color spa-ing, and take note when I do. Whether it’s economics, accessibility, or a cultural thing, I feel like that should change. Culturally, as women of color, I feel like we oftentimes put ourselves last. Not sure if that’s true for other cultures, as I can only speak from my experience, but as black women we are often taught (consciously or subconsciously) to cater to everyone else first— our kids, mates, parents, families, before taking care of ourselves. In my family, mothering everyone was once seen as an expression of love and worn as a badge of pride. But consistent neglect can obviously wear on one emotionally and manifest into bigger health issues. I’m still trying to become comfortable with the notion that ‘Self care is not selfish.’ It actually fills you up, so that you can better take care of others.

Happy after my spa treatment!

6. The cost is worth it.

I have no shame in sharing that I’m on a budget, as are many women. I realize that spending about $100 or more on a massage or spa experience can be a luxury from an economic standpoint. But if you have the means, it’s really not that expensive when you think about it. We often spend the same amount on material things, that don’t benefit us as much in the long run. I had to ask myself, “Isn’t your peace of mind worth at least $100?” Btw— spas often offer great deals on Groupon. Some places also offer a much lower base rate, if you only want to access their tubs and saunas, without doing a treatment. Locations that I’ve gone to in the past will give you access to their tubs for $20 or less. (Call the spa itself for more details).

7. My mini spa trip has helped me “mom” better.

See number five  The only person that can help you become a better person is yourself. I’m learning that by consistently pouring into myself, doing whatever makes me feel full, has helped me give more to others. It’s also helped me be more patient, flexible, and kind. I usually experience a happy ‘spa high’ after returning from a massage or treatment. It lasts for a few hours. But in this instance, I took the time to consciously and fully unwind. My ‘spa high’ is now going on a week strong! The trip also inspired me to adapt more healthy lifestyle choices, which I’d previously put on the back burner.

Note: This blog is an account of my experience at the spa, not a paid ad or endorsement. It’s important to be aware of any new or preexisting health conditions or concerns before going to a spa. Please consult your doctor, if needed. Also, see Olympic Spa’s ‘Words of Caution’ here.